Mostly Funny Quotes and some regular quotes

 Lots and Lots of Quotes!!

• When life throws you lemons throw them at mean people and hope it gets in their eyes.

• When life hands u lemons throw them at somebody.

• When life hands u lemons throw them bac and ask for chocolate!

• Practice makes perfect but nobody is perfect so why practice?

• The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat.

• You miss all the shots that you dont take

• Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you.  Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch it to be sure.

• Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.

• People who snore always fall asleep first.

• When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane

• Everyone has a photographic memory.  Some just don't have film.

• Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

• Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.

• Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

• Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.

• Everyone wants to go to Heaven, but nobody wants to die.
  

• "...Halfway across the river, the scorpion stung the turtle. 'Why did you do that?" the turtle asked. 'Now we'll both drown.' 'This is Africa,' replied the scorpion

• Friendship is like peeing on urself, everyone can see it but only u get the warm feeling it brings!

• "There is not enough time to do all the nothing you want to do."

• "Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."

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